Saturday, March 16, 2013

Hey, Let's Detox Folks...Yeah, We'll Suck the Toxins Out Through Our Feet....

A few years ago, a local newspaper reporter went to a local spa to have the toxins removed from his body. Yes, they used that foot bath thing. You know the one. They put clear water in it, you put your feet in, they turn it on, and by magic toxins are sucked out through your feet. Yep, and you can even tell where the toxins came from by checking out the colors of the water.
I grabbed this off of a local place, that yes, does this type of stuff.

"IONIC DETOX FOOT BATHS During the ionic foot detoxification your feet are placed in clear water for thirty minutes. During that time toxins are released from your pores draining your body of chemicals in the foot detoxification bath that can make you unhealthy. The chart below describes the color index."

And even more baloney from this place. Yep, this is on their Website.


"The ionic foot machine is a modern day energy device that safely and effectively helps balance the body's natural energy system. More specifically, it also works in essence by introducing a high level of negative ions into water of a foot bath/soak, the feet, utilizing principles of reflexology and the science of ionization and osmosis, create a positive cellular environment and enable the body's natural detoxification abilities and processes to function at their maximum. Negative ions attract positive ions. For this reason, it's recommended that you add a clear quartz crystal to the tub (water) to enhance the cleansing effect during an ionic foot detox bath session."

Folks, folks, folks...this is truly sad. I doubt there is any hope for us. Did you notice the part about the quartz crystal? Think about this for a minute. Yes, it's 2013 and we're all supposed to be grownups...and we're going to put a frickin' crystal in our foot detox tub to suck out even more toxins.



I remember watching the video that the newspaper had made. Yep, the woman who was administering the treatment, had on a, yes, she had on a white coat. Dang, I've always wanted a job where I can wear a white coat.

Anyway, what am I working up to?
Let's see, these folks say they can suck the toxins out of your body by you sticking your feet, in what must be, some kind of magic gizmo. You know, it's sucking out the toxins.
Well, here's a question that I think I a can reasonably ask, If this actually works, that is, if these gizmos actually suck out the toxins, why doesn't my doctor use these?
You know, Please get here 30 minutes early for your appointment so that we can suck the toxins out of you before you see the doctor. Yeah, I mean, I'd get to the waiting room and we'd all be getting the toxins sucked out of us. Why is my doctor not using this?

OK, folks, wasted enough time here. Please, I hope if you're reading this you surely know this is just another scam. Yep, hey, put some water in one of these gizmos, and don't put your feet in and yes the water will go from clear to something else. That's just how it works.

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